Dr. Celia
00:00 – 00:28
You know that moment you’re like squeezing a project before your kids wake up or started working during precious nap time and you got your coffee, you got your planner, you got your perfectly organized like Notion dashboard and then you freeze. If you’re a high-achieving mom running a business, this might sound familiar. Like staring at your task list, feeling that your heart’s racing because everything feels so urgent. Or even like spending 30 minutes planning your content calendar, instead of actually creating content.
Dr. Celia
00:29 – 00:49
Or how about this, like just opening and closing the same three apps on your phone, trying to decide which client project deserves your attention first. or even like telling yourself I need to find the right productivity system. Here’s what I discovered after working with like mom business owners and as a psychiatrist. There’s usually like an underlying emotion behind these patterns.
Dr. Celia
00:50 – 01:06
Like when you’re feeling stuck, scattered, or like spinning in circles, it’s not about productivity at all. It’s about what’s happening underneath the surface. Welcome to the emotions behind your schedule. This is a series where we’re going to uncover the real reasons your perfectly planned days keep falling apart.
Dr. Celia
01:07 – 01:44
And today we’re going to be talking about feeling anxious because well, let’s be honest, like running a business while raising kiddos, like that’s basically like an anxiety obstacle course at this point. By the end of our time together, you’ll understand what’s really happening when you sit down to work and more importantly, how to finally move forward instead of staying stuck in the planning phase. So before diving in, I just want to be clear that today we’re talking about feeling anxious, those everyday moments of uncertainty and worry that comes with building a business while raising a family. We will not be discussing clinical anxiety disorders classified by the DSM-5.
Dr. Celia
01:44 – 02:03
What I’m sharing today isn’t a substitute for medical advice. If you are experiencing symptoms of anxiety that interfere with your daily life, please reach out to your healthcare provider. So now let’s talk about what’s really happening in those moments when you sit down to work. And I want to share something with you that I see in my clients all the time.
Dr. Celia
02:03 – 02:23
A mom business owner comes to me thinking that she has like a productivity problem, like she’s smart, successful, totally capable, but something keeps always getting in the way when she’s trying to actually execute her plans. And this is what it looks like when anxiety is running the show. Like you sit down to work and suddenly everything feels urgent. The client proposal, urgent.
Dr. Celia
02:23 – 02:47
Updating the website, also urgent. And your brain is telling you that everything needs to happen right now. or maybe you find yourself like researching the perfect project management system instead of working on the actual project or like reorganizing your task list for the third time today or even feeling like you have a little bit more planning you need to do before you can start or even convincing yourself you need to find the right time to begin.
Dr. Celia
02:48 – 03:16
and uh this reminds me of like I was sitting in my office one morning staring at my calendar like I had two summits coming up in the same week and I came up like and what I ended up doing was like I was working on draft after draft after draft of what I was gonna say and then when I finally got the draft done I rehearsed it like 50 billion times hubby was walking by and he overheard me and said hey hun you know you sound good you don’t need to keep practicing And you know what I ended up doing? I kept practicing.
Dr. Celia
03:17 – 03:37
I was scared that if I didn’t practice and remember all my talking points, I was going to sound like I wasn’t an expert. Like I felt so anxious that my heart was beating so fast, my palms were sweating. Once I realized my thought and emotion, I realized I was trying to control what will happen more than making sure I knew my talking points. Did I need to practice more?
Dr. Celia
03:38 – 03:46
No. Was my anxiety telling me I need to have more control? Absolutely. The thing is, these are not just habits.
Dr. Celia
03:47 – 04:04
They’re how your brain tries to create certainty when you’re feeling uncertain. They’re also how anxiety shows up when you’re building something meaningful, also while raising kiddos, who remind you daily that control is an illusion. So what’s really happening here? As a psychiatrist, let me break down why your brain does this.
Dr. Celia
04:05 – 04:23
And what I’m going to do is I’m going to give you a high level view of how anxiety works in the brain. So your brain is constantly assessing and analyzing everything. What you see, hear, feel, and even your past memories It assesses everything in like real time. And you actually got like two key players here.
Dr. Celia
04:23 – 04:47
You got like your prefrontal cortex, who’s basically like your CEO brain, who handles all the executive functioning, like planning, decision making, and predicting consequences. And this is where your high achieving mom superpowers live. And then there’s your limbic system, particularly an area called amygdala. And this process of motion such as fear and stores memories.
Dr. Celia
04:47 – 04:58
And these two systems work together, communicating back and forth. And here’s what happened when you’re building a business while raising a family, like uncertainty is everywhere. Will this launch work? Will this client sign?
Dr. Celia
04:58 – 05:14
Will the strategy pay off? And let’s be honest, your kids remind you daily that you cannot control anything. So when your brain perceives these uncertainties as threats, your emotional center goes into hyperdrive. It’s actually overpowering your CEO brain, triggering that flight or flight response.
Dr. Celia
05:14 – 05:32
Like, and I think you may have never noticed this, like, hello, like racing heart or like sweaty palms. And your brain, trying to be helpful, says that like, hey, I know what can make you feel better. Let’s try to control everything we can. And that’s when anxiety shows up and is disguised as, I just need to be more prepared.
Dr. Celia
05:33 – 06:03
I should double check everything one more time. If I plan this perfectly, nothing will go wrong. And here’s what’s fascinating about high achieving moms, like the same traits that make you successful, attention to detail, commitment to excellence, ability to anticipate problems, these can actually fuel anxiety patterns. Like, think about it, your ability to plan ahead becomes over planning, and like your high standards become perfectionism, and your desire to serve becomes people pleasing And the more uncertain things feel, the stronger these patterns get.
Dr. Celia
06:04 – 06:19
It’s like your brain is saying, if we only work harder, plan better, move faster, maybe we could guarantee success. Listen, I need you to hear something important. What’s happening isn’t because you’re broken or doing something wrong. Your brain, it’s actually trying to help you, like really try to help you.
Dr. Celia
06:20 – 06:53
like you know when you’re trying to stare at the to-do list feeling frozen that is your brain going hey let’s try to make this safer by controlling all the things it’s like having a very overprotective friend who means well but sometimes you know goes a bit overboard the thing is building a business while using kiddos that’s inherently messy and uncertain and no amount of perfect planning is going to change that So here’s what we’re going to do instead. Let’s stop fighting our brain and start working with it. Because once you understand what’s really going up in your brain, everything else starts to shift.
Dr. Celia
06:54 – 07:09
Remember the goal isn’t to eliminate these feelings completely, that’s not even realistic or helpful. Instead we want to recognize them as signals and respond differently. Here’s what that looks like in practice. So when you’re feeling anxious, number one, first pause and notice.
Dr. Celia
07:09 – 07:17
Is your heart racing? Are your thoughts spinning? That’s your limbic system in activation. It’s not a sign that something’s wrong, it’s just your brain being overprotective.
Dr. Celia
07:18 – 07:38
The second thing I want you to do is take three deep breaths. And this, this is not just feel good advice. This actually helps your nervous system regulate and bring your CEO brain, you know, like the prefrontal cortex I talked about back online. Like, and when you take deep breaths, it allows more oxygen to actually get to your brain to help you think clearer.
Dr. Celia
07:42 – 08:15
Step number three is ask yourself, why do I feel anxious? And step number four is once you are figuring out the reason of why you feel anxious, number four is name the anxiety and process it. And by processing it, I mean you could journal it out or you could like talk it out in a voice memo or just like give it some air time so you’re able to kind of like see it, name it, work through it. And number five is now that you have awareness of it, what tiny step today can you do to move the needle closer to your goal?
Dr. Celia
08:16 – 08:52
And let me give you an example of like how this worked for me recently. Like I was feeling really anxious about an upcoming podcast interview and instead of like jumping to my usual pattern of like over preparing, I paused, I noticed my racing thoughts and then I actually took those deep breaths and After I did that like I felt a bit a little bit calmer but still anxious and then I was like asking myself why was I feeling really anxious and through like a quick voice memo I realized I was worried that I wouldn’t have enough to say and once I named that I could see for what it is just my productive brain doing its thing.
Dr. Celia
08:52 – 09:28
My tiny step was I decided to write down bullet points of what I wanted to talk about not like a full prep session of like the whole interview but just like little bullet points are like these are the things I really want to cover in the interview and that was just a small step for me and you know what that clarity helped calm my brain down enough to approach the rest of the preparation with focus instead of fear So here’s what I want you to take away from today. When you find yourself frozen in front of the perfectly organized Notion dashboard, remember, it’s not a productivity problem. It’s your productive brain trying to create certainty in an uncertain world.
Dr. Celia
09:29 – 09:48
And those moments of anxiety, they’re not a sign that you’re doing something wrong. They’re actually proof that you’re doing something meaningful. Because building a business while raising a family is not supposed to feel completely So your next step is simple. Like the next time you sit down to work and you feel that familiar freeze, try the five steps I mentioned.
Dr. Celia
09:49 – 10:02
Pause and notice is step number one. Step number two is take three deep breaths. Step number three is ask yourself, why are you feeling anxious? Step number four is name and process it.
Dr. Celia
10:03 – 10:19
And step number five is choose a tiny step forward. So, speaking of working with your brain, it’s set against it. You ever wonder why some mom business owners seem to get more done with less stress while you’re struggling to make the usual productivity hacks work? Here’s the truth.
Dr. Celia
10:20 – 10:38
You’ve got a hidden time hacking superpower that’s just waiting to be unleashed. In just two minutes, discover your unique way of managing time that works with your personality, not against it. No more forcing yourself with someone else’s system. Find out exactly how you are naturally wired to be the most productive in your business and mom life.
Dr. Celia
10:38 – 11:00
And the link is in the show notes. So next week, we’re going to be talking about another emotion that might be hijacking your schedule, overwhelm. You know, the feeling that you get when you have like 37 tabs open on your browser, like literally and mentally, and you can’t decide which one needs your attention first, because sometimes the problem isn’t anxiety. It’s just that so much is happening at once.
Dr. Celia
11:01 – 11:09
Until then, remember, your anxiety is not the enemy. It’s just your brain trying to protect you. The key is learning to work with it, not against it.
